I've said it before and i'll say it again and I'll keep saying it till someone stands up and says "Yeah I know this dude!" and we can stand there and eye each other in mutual understanding and solidarity.
No matter how hard it is and how much it breaks my heart I find that I keep coming back to it day after day after day. Like a glutton for punishment if i'm not actively writing i'm thinking about writing. If i'm not thinking about writing i'm reading, which inevitably leads me to thinking about writing. If I were catholic I'd have a name for this neurosis, Self-Flagellation, alas I am not Catholic so i'm just going to have make up a name for my neurosis. How does Writeaholic sound? Meh to predictable. What about Writerisis? Yeah I like that better too. Back to my original post, writing is hard work, it's not JUST about writing, if it were just about writing anyone could do it and let's face it we've all read some pretty bad books in our day. I live in constant fear of being one of those authors. You know the type, they wrote some pretty good stuff in the begining then resting on thier laurels they started to turn out some real crap and fed it to the masses. Of course that crap will make the NY Times best seller list regardless of the fact that everyone knows it's total crap. I don't want to write to write, I want to write to entertain and if i'm bored reading it then how do I expect anyone else to read it?
The hard part isn't writing that part is easy, no the hard part is having an idea, letting it ferment and grow and germinate and reach and unfurl until FINALLY it's all there a fully formed fetus ripe for the birthing. Sometimes that babie's ugly and requires quite a few face lifts to be digestible and sometimes it's ok looking from the start but it's, you know, average. Average is NOT what a writer sets out to be. We are telling stories people!!! You want to pay good money to see a movie that's average? No you don't!! As a matter of fact when you see the trailers if the movie looks average what do you say to yourself? You say "Self i'm not paying 9 bucks to see that average movie i'll wait till it goes to DVD and I can rent it for a buck". No one wants to write an average book and no one wants to watch an average movie. This is what makes writing hard. What seperates an average story from an exceptional story? What makes a story engaging, funny, tragic, sad, in short a story worth reading! I'm still figuring this out, i've been trying to figure it out for decades.
Passion that is what makes the difference, when you feel the writing like you are living it. That my dear is what captivates. I only wish I had it for real. Instead I am the once in a grand while it all comes together beautifully but otherwise means little to people not involved. While I wish I was better I just don't want to devote myself to it either. Good luck to you, because well you have more than avg in almost all of your writing!
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